The previous 3 years my health had taken a downward spiral. The
effects my cancer experience had on my friends, family and
community were enormous and I'd like to share these with you.
I had a 21st party the weekend before my actual
birthday date which was the day of my biopsy. The whole community
was there to wish me luck, support and celebrate my night with me.
The support from the community was fantastic. I even received cards
from the pupils at the local primary school while I was receiving
my radiation treatment. This is very special as I attended this
school too and am also training to be a teacher.
My family was affected immensely by this journey. My mother had
thought (like all mothers do) that she could bring me home from
university and make me better. However this was not to be and soon
put considerable strain on the family as I just got sicker. My
biopsy in Auckland City hospital turned into a 3 month stint in
hospital at both Auckland City and Waikato hospital which meant
trying to run a farm on the East Coast and be there for support was
difficult for Mum and Dad. Living in a city for this long soon
started to get to my family as we are country bumpkins and have
issues with huge crowds of people, cars and large cities. My sister
and my best friend quit her job milking cows in Opotiki and moved
home to help run the farm which also meant I got an occasional
visit from her. Her twin brother started making frequent phone
calls to my cell phone while I was in hospital to check up on me.
Phone calls had previously been ghost of the past as both my
brother and sister hate the telephone. My older brother who was
living in Australia at the time came home for my 21st
and about 3 weeks later moved back to New Zealand for good.
Although the reasons why he moved back to New Zealand have not been
discussed. I am secretly glad he did move back to New Zealand even
if he was at Mount Maunganui. Consoling a distraught
Grandmother on the telephone while you are been wheeled around the
hospital in a wheel chair is not on my list of to
dos. I found this extremely hard thinking, 'It's no
big deal. I'm ok .Why is my grandmother more upset than me?'
Although on a positive note I got to catch up with my mother's
side of the family who live in the Waikato. We had lost contact
with most of them when we moved to the East Coast 11 years ago. I
was even let out on day leave from the hospital to attend their
family reunion. I learnt I have a fantastic supportive family and
it was great they were close by for my mother especially. This also
meant there was never a shortage of visits, flowers and hugs while
in hospital. It also makes follow up appointments almost fun
knowing that I can catch up with some of the family and always have
a place to stay. This experience had brought both my immediate
family and my extended family very close. I never imagined me being
sick could do so much damage and affect so many people in so many
ways.
CanTeen had been fantastic in my later part of this journey. It
is a safe place with a great support network that had helped me
deal with my ordeal and the guilt I have surrounding it. CanTeen
also helped me overcome the anxious feelings I had after not being
in the social scene for a long time.
I also think it is fantastic that not only does CanTeen support
patients but their siblings as well. I think this is awesome as
siblings suffer just as badly as the patients. However my sister
and I do not talk about our feeling surrounding this event and I
have yet to get her to become a member of CanTeen.
Cancer is tough, it's a life experience and a journey but with
the help of my family and CanTeen it has just become a small blip
in the radar.